I do not know how to describe the way I feel when I see bad news painted on all my social media news feeds about my beautiful country PNG.
I gladly admit that I purposely choose not to read the news, nor attempt to meddle with the comment sections of posts because it robs me of my peace.
When I say it is emotionally draining, it is an understatement. I fail to really articulate the thoughts that run through my head. The fear that creeps into my mind. The disgust that fills my soul. The anger that rushes through my body. The sadness that stabs my heart.
A love-hate relationship.
But the compassion I have for my country makes me hopeful. I want to right wrongs. I want to restore peace. I want to change the conversation. I want to instill hope into both young and old. I want to build people up, and not tear them down. I want to teach, but I want to learn in return. I want to talk about solutions, and not paraphrase the same issues. I want answers, and not a question as an answer.
Like my supervisor reminded me today, “Milcah, you can’t fix everything that is wrong about PNG. Focus on your sphere of the things you can control, and you will be able to influence a greater sphere outside of yourself”.
So everyday I hope to start small. I hope to capitalise on the areas of my life that I can control to influence a tiny change. My words and actions must have a purpose. This degree will serve a purpose that is greater than myself.